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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • Exactly this. It can absolutely be a fulfilling relationship, but it takes significantly more work than being a pair does.

    It also isn’t a good fit for everyone. You have to be not only extremely confident in the existing relationship, but also secure enough in yourself to understand that your partners are going to have independent relationships with each other just like you have an independent relationship with each of them. A lot of people just struggle with that.

    Personally I find it to be a very rewarding experience, but I full expect that to not be the case for most.

    If it is something OP decides to engage with I would definitely recommend lots of reading on poly relationships, seeing a relationship counselor who specializes in open \ poly relationships, and visiting poly forums to talk about the potential pitfalls \rewards.












  • Without trying to sound too metaphysical. I look at it this way. The atoms that make up my body were forged in the hearts of stars. These atoms have existed in some form across the universe for billions of years.

    I don’t remember what patterns my atoms were before they became this one, and I don’t know what pattern these atoms will take once I am done with them, but these atoms will remain.

    This consciousness that has arisen from this pattern of atoms may give way to a different consciousness in a different pattern of atoms in some untold amount of time. While this consciousness may not know of that one, and that one may not remember this, it eases my mind to know that the stardust that originated these atoms will still exist.

    It eases my mind to know that in the infinite void of nothingness, this pattern of atoms and this consciousness have impacted those around me. The short period of time that this consciousness is around gives me the opportunity to experience the wonderful breadth of the human condition, because this will be the only time these atoms are in this exact pattern. Every moment of my existence I am unique.

    I am of the universe, I have experienced the universe, and others have experienced the universe through me.



  • I am something of an over planner, but it took me probably 40 hours to get the themes and major plot points nailed down for all three acts. Then, probably another 40 to flesh out act 1 to the point I was ready to bring the players into the sandbox.

    For the first year, I was then spending about 3 hours of prep time per session to tie in all the character backgrounds and weave them into the narrative. After the first year, it was down to probably an hour of prep per session unless they were about to transition between acts, or a major character story was happening.







  • As a DM, there are two reasons I ask this kind of question.

    If it’s a player that I know is comfortable playing their role, then I am trying to get them to lean into the scene to assist with story pacing, or potentially to reveal additional information.

    There are still benefits to asking it though, even if a player is not comfortable playing out the scene. Even without a spotlighted stage, you can still obtain a lot of character development by asking for additional clarity. For instance, did the character want to use a cheesy pickup line, or maybe a humorous anecdote, maybe they want to be really suave.

    I would probably ask some leading questions like the above, but that additional info can still greatly expand the scene without turning it into a night at the improv.