Jesus Christ, yes, I am a comfort hunter. You think I get up at the ass crack of dawn every day for fun? You think I want to push buttons on a computer all day because I’m just weirdly into it?
No! I do this shit because I have to!
Fucking hell. I’ve already accepted that I have to make your company money if I want to live in a house. For the love of all that is good in this world, PLEASE do not make me pretend to like it. I’m already weirded out that you’re so into it.
Disorganized list b/c I can’t be assed to format:
The follicles on your face will grow at different rates. Even if you’re going for length, trimming your beard to let the slower hairs catch up can give you a fuller and thicker beard. I will sometimes take some electric clippers and just trim back the faster growing hairs to give my beard a more defined shape.
Trim the sides & mustache occasionally. Imagine a line starting a half inch or so away from your face, starting where your hair ends & sideburns begin and going straight down to the ground. Trim the sides of your beard following that line, and trim your mustache to stop the hairs from getting in your mouth. A santa-esque beard is longer than it is wide, so you’ll probably need to shape it that way.
Your facial hair will probably wick moisture away from your skin. You’re already out ahead of this with the beard oil, which is great. I personally prefer using a beard butter, but anything that keeps the skin underneath moisturized is important. One time I shaved & it almost looked like my cheeks had been sunburned.
This one is personal preference, but I keep my neck mostly shaved. I draw a line starting two fingers above my Adam’s apple, and bring it up to the corners of my jaw. Everything below gets either shaved or at least hit with the clippers on the lowest guard. I also take my wife’s eyebrow razor and clean up the top of my cheeks, to straighten out the top of my beard. Totally optional, but makes it look cleaner IMO.
TL;DR Growing a beard =/= not shaving. Trim it to give it shape, shave neck & the top of your cheeks to give it lines, continue to moisturize / oil it.
Some kid in PA tried to do something last year.
I don’t know about you nerds but that skeleton is definitely part of me. I don’t live in it: I AM it.
“Port” and “left” both have four letters. “Starboard” is the other one.
Learned that trick a few years ago and have not forgotten since.
Simple solution: make the moon farther away.
Representatives “punched” and “body-slammed” the ICE agents, she added.
LMAO. Super soldier democratic elected officials, defeating heavily militarized police units using unarmed combat. I believe it!
As usual, Republicans accuse Democrats of being much cooler than they really are.
Love that podcast! That’s how I learned about the corpse thing.
The obsession with animal corpses. The myriad bizarre diseases and conditions. The desperate attempt to bring back measles. The reckless disregard for public health. The unnerving face that dips into the uncanny valley.
Folks, I think RFK jr may be Pestilence.
Folks.
If you ever catch yourself describing how you want to torture someone to death, I want you to stop and take inventory of your priorities.
Look. I am not a pacifist. Some motherfuckers need to be removed from positions of power by any means necessary, up to and including violence.
That being said, should we not focus on restorative justice and rehabilitation? Why create unnecessary suffering in the process? The argument that things like the death penalty act as a deterrent doesn’t seem to be borne out in the evidence. What good is served by torturing someone, even if they’re the nastiest son of a bitch in existence?
It is important to make sure we don’t let killing for sport seep into our ideology. Using violence against people is not something we should take pleasure in, let alone fantasize about. History has given us plenty of examples to draw from here; once you make a policy out of sadism, the group of people you use violence against only grows.
Also, porn is fine in moderation (like everything else) and can be made totally consensually, you terminally online freaks.
I feel like there’s this explot in human psychology:
People are pretty bad at matching causes to effects.
Doing something novel / outside your usual routine can feel pretty good, regardless of what it is you’re doing.
Therefore: People who try weird diets, snake oils, or letting the sun shine on their asshole really do feel better afterwards, at least for a while. That must mean it works!
Hey folks, I’ve been asleep for the past few hundred years. Can’t wait to see how the profit motive has universally overlapped with providing the most utility to society! Such a neat little hack.
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Uh oh. Uhhhh… Oh no…
You bring up a good point, but I don’t think religion necessarily involves the kind of unreality I have in mind.
A lot of religious claims deal with things that are unfalsifiable. Invisible forces, unreachable gods, consciousness after death, things like that. Not the most rational stuff in the world, but not obviously false on the face of it either.
Now, though, we’ve got folks believing things that are easily disproven. Climate change denial, anti-vaccine bullshit, the never-ending parade of moral panics churned out by the above mentioned propaganda machine, Jewish space lasers, pet eating immigrants, etc.
I won’t go so far as to say that religion never causes people to deny observable reality; it surely does. But I think the right wing media empire we have now does so intentionally and on a scale greater than any religious movement I can think of.
The bad news: The most evil people in the world spend billions every year on the largest propaganda machine in the history of man, and it enthralls a large minority of us.
The good news: That’s what it takes to maintain this! This many people living in a bubble of unreality is not natural! It is the product of a machine built by man, and all machines built by man are destined to eventually fail. Maybe the right person dies at the right time. Maybe the conflict between their narrative and reality eventually becomes too much. Maybe they lose control of the story and the movement splinters into hundreds of contradictory conspiracy theories that no longer move in lockstep. Maybe the magic just wears off one day.
He also loves money and has no principles. People doing something because they have values is just not something he understands.
Fun facts!
85% of people arrested with fentanyl at the border as U.S. citizens.
The vast majority of people arrested here for trafficking children are U.S. citizens (and children are over 3x more likely to be trafficked by an acquaintance or relative than they are a random kidnapper).
“Illegal aliens” commit less crime than natural born U.S. citizens.
Violent immigrants, perverted trans people, and incompetent DEI hires are all moral panics. You hear so much about them because the Republican party has nothing to offer that will make your life safer or easier.
I keep getting recruiters sending me in-office jobs on the other side of the country and not even telling me the salary range. You’re asking me to break my lease, uproot my family, and leave behind all my local friends. If your salary is low enough that you don’t want to advertise it up front, why would I ever even consider doing all that?
The media is gonna spin things no matter what. Dems should not let that stop them.
What fucking losers. These are the people who are (according to their own PR) supposed to risk their lives to protect the public. If the theme song to a children’s show and some light ribbing is all it takes to keep you away, fucking resign.