“Good for you. Have a cookie. My $20 Casio tells the time just as well.”

“Okay?”

I am not a friend of clever comebacks. People who point these things out are pathetic and people who get triggered by that only slightly less so.

Damn thats a cheap watch, is it Chinese too?

What’s my motivation? Is there a reason why I’m listening to Alec Baldwin brag about his watch? What’s stopping me from simply walking away?

Can your watch play Bad Apple?

Can your watch run Doom?

Can you install Arch on that watch?

…

… didn’t think so 😛

You paid all that money for a watch that can’t do ANY cool stuff? You utter loser 🤣 🤣 🤣

I guess it’s true, money can’t buy taste.

Fun fact: Alec Baldwin’s character was invented for the movie to provide exposition. The filmmakers didn’t trust movie-going audiences to pick up the information from the three conversations that occur at the beginning of the play.

“You should have saved up a bit more and bought something less gaudy”

I don’t have a car

I don’t care to respond

I don’t mind sounding poor.

Wealth beyond what is good for you is no better than theft I’d say. Buying expensive watches while little children grow up in poverty is nothing to be proud of. If anyone should feel shame it should be that guy. Don’t be humiliated by such shameless assholes. And don’t try to counter attack, It won’t work, they don’t share your values, they feel no shame for the things that they do. Instead let’s organize and fight them where it hurts. Taxes, taxes, taxes.

Why the fuck would I drive a watch ?

A shame, such a tasteless choice. If you had as much class as money, you’d have chosen something like a vintage 1960s submariner rather than a frivolous toy available on every high street in the world.

If only you had learned to tell time.

All these comments are trying too hard. The only two options are “OK?” and “that watch?”

Verbose disses only work in rap

“that’s cute!”

“You got ripped off”

Barf in his face.