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Da Cap’n to News@lemmy.worldEnglish • 5 months ago

Trump Orders Musk to Get Air Force One Finished Quickly, Even If It Isn't Fully Safe Yet

futurism.com

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Trump Orders Musk to Get Air Force One Finished Quickly, Even If It Isn't Fully Safe Yet

futurism.com

Da Cap’n to News@lemmy.worldEnglish • 5 months ago
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Donald Trump is bringing in Elon Musk to speed up Boeing's lagging construction of two new Air Force One jets.
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  • @regrub@lemmy.world
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    307•5 months ago

    Really rooting for them on that corner-cutting endeavor. What’s the worst that could happen?

    • @KoboldCoterie@pawb.social
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      237•5 months ago

      Some Boeing workers could be real American heroes right about now.

      • @HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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        110•5 months ago

        Quality Assurance is really over rated. DOGE should cut those fuck faces first for freedom fighters sake.

        • @sndmn@lemmy.ca
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          28•5 months ago

          Boeing, QA… lol

      • @cybervseas@lemmy.world
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        90•5 months ago

        In Japan, heart surgeon. Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But, mistake! Yakuza boss die. Yakuza very mad. I hide in fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car, and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret: I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!

        • @3x7x37@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          2•4 months ago

          deleted by creator

          • @cybervseas@lemmy.world
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            3•4 months ago

            The Office

      • @meathorse@lemmy.world
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        24•5 months ago

        A real team effort if the air traffic controllers join the effort too

      • Florencia (she/her)
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        4•4 months ago

        By royal decree, the children of maintenance workers are to travel in the rear of the aircraft. /s

      • @Mirshe@lemmy.world
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        4•4 months ago

        I’m reminded of that one time the entire Polish government was killed in a plane crash in Smolensk.

    • @xmunk@sh.itjust.works
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      56•5 months ago

      The worst thing that could happen would be nothing going wrong.

    • IninewCrow
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      13•5 months ago

      They should just screw the schedule and get on the plane right now

    • @Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10•4 months ago

      Well, the BEST that could happen would be for it to crash into the side of a mountain while both of them are on it. Bonus points if Vance, Johnson, and Stephen Miller are on it too.

    • @floofloof@lemmy.ca
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      9•
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      5 months ago

      I hear duct tape is good for holding wings on, in a pinch.

      • @KickMeElmo@sopuli.xyz
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        12•5 months ago

        You joke, but you have no idea how much speed tape gets used on the average plane…

        • @porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml
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          13•5 months ago

          Ah, is that how they go so fast?

          • @Klear@lemmy.world
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            5•5 months ago

            Nah, that’s the red paint all over their insides.

    • @Ledericas@lemm.ee
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      3•5 months ago

      probably repurpose/ reused used spacex, tesla vehicle materials

  • @shittydwarf@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    170•5 months ago

    • @NatakuNox@lemmy.world
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      5•4 months ago

      I’m pretty handy with a roll of construction tape if they need help.

  • @taiyang@lemmy.world
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    151•4 months ago

    An underpaid Boeing engineer has a chance to accidentally do one of the funniest, most earth saving oopsies of all time.

    • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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      78•4 months ago

    • @underisk@lemmy.ml
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      26•4 months ago

      I don’t think they let the VP travel in the same plane at the same time so probably not as earth saving as you’d expect. Definitely very funny though.

      • @overload@sopuli.xyz
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        33•4 months ago

        Well, there are two planes being rushed…

        • @Jericho_Kane@lemmy.org
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          28•4 months ago

          Air force one and air force two hit eachother mid air 10 hour ASMR to fall asleep to.

        • @Goun@lemmy.ml
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          4 months ago

          So we can put Musk on one plane, then Vance and Trump on the other one, perfect

          • @overload@sopuli.xyz
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            9•4 months ago

            🤌

      • @Goodmorningsunshine@lemmy.world
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        2•4 months ago

        Good think Skum isn’t VP. There’s no law to say he and that corpse he keeps company in the oval office can’t fly and die together.

  • @TransplantedSconie@lemm.ee
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    deleted by creator

    • @HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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      29•5 months ago

      I think glitch McCuntel has a pilot’s license. Let him and Jesus take the wheel.

      • @glitch1985@lemmy.world
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        16•5 months ago

        Full Self Flying has got everything under control

      • @mister_flibble@lemm.ee
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        5•5 months ago

        Maybe one of those OceanGate guys who didn’t turn into a fine pink mist can hook him up with a MadCatz controller

    • @AlternatePersonMan@lemmy.world
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      7•5 months ago

      The irony would be delicious

    • @hansolo@lemm.ee
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      7•5 months ago

      The AP will be the only media that survives.

  • @Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world
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    105•5 months ago

    If Musk can fly a rocket, Trump reportedly told associates, per the NYT, he can probably fly an airplane.

    You guys are all such a joke.

    Sucks millions or billions will die when you blame the plane crash on Canada or Denmark or Ukraine.

    • @sfxrlz@lemmy.world
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      48•5 months ago

      Or DEI … again

      • @meco03211@lemmy.world
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        6•5 months ago

        Has no one made the gif from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas when Dr. Gonzo opens the salt shaker of cocaine and subtitled it “Did you see what god DEI did to us?”

        • @jaybone@lemmy.world
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          3•4 months ago

          I want to see Musk “flying” a rocket Dr. Strangelove style.

    • @Glitterbomb@lemmy.world
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      3•4 months ago

      Is that pile of punctuation another one of elons kids?

    • @NotSteve_@lemmy.ca
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      2•4 months ago

      or Mexico, or Panama, or the UK, or everyone except for the AFD in Germany.

      The US is looking awfully lonely right now

  • @GalacticGrapefruit@lemmy.world
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    103•4 months ago

    Please, God, if you’re listening, do something really really funny with this.

    • @samus12345@lemm.ee
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      17•4 months ago

      “Didn’t you people learn from the Holocaust that I either don’t exist or am evil if I do?”

      • @MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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        6•4 months ago

        Not evil, indifferent.

        • @samus12345@lemm.ee
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          2•4 months ago

          If he has the power to stop the suffering, being indifferent to it is evil. If not, sure.

          • @MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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            3•4 months ago

            Maybe, but does your indifference to the insects you kill while hiking make you evil?

            • @stetech@lemmy.world
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              1•4 months ago

              Maybe, but did you just compare millions of human beings’ suffering to a handful of insects?

              Besides, why are you comparing individuals’ indifference to God’s (potential) indifference? I don’t think that’s a fair comparison.

              • @MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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                2•4 months ago

                If you’re a God, yes.

            • @samus12345@lemm.ee
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              1•4 months ago

              Only if I’m doing so intentionally. I don’t have the power to know where every insect is and keep them from harm accordingly.

    • @Naz@sh.itjust.works
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      16•
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      4 months ago

      Holy shit so many desperate prayers in one thread

      I think they can be convinced to pause their game of Jenga or Connect Four for a few minutes of structural integrity or engine failure

      The Big Man … Big Entity has Big Priorities, you know?

    • @NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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      8•4 months ago

      With the recent history in aviation, I’m going to be praying like mad. Please tell me they’re still Boeing products?

  • @Treczoks@lemmy.world
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    100•5 months ago

    Boeing, Musk, and a rushed time frame? I’ve rarely seen a better recipe for disaster. Maybe we are lucky and Trump and his cronies just fall from the sky even on the first flight.

    • @Klear@lemmy.world
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      55•5 months ago

      It would be a nice reminder that a disaster isn’t the same thing as a tragedy.

      • Flying Squid
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        22•5 months ago

        I don’t know, President Vance sounds like a tragedy to me…

        • @Klear@lemmy.world
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          37•5 months ago

          Yeah, there’s no way he’d be on the Air Force One. He’s always flying couch.

          • @jaybone@lemmy.world
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            9•4 months ago

            Chair Force One

        • @Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          9•4 months ago

          Better an uncharismatic couch fucker being unable to talk his way out of hot water than a geriatric orange Hitler.

          • @Ledericas@lemm.ee
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            2•
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            4 months ago

            hes allegedly searched up dolphin paraphelia before too.

    • @ImADifferentBird@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      5•4 months ago

      And don’t forget gutting the FAA.

      • @Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        1•4 months ago

        The only job the FAA has with regards to Airforce One is to keep the sky free if AO is up there. Might be a problem, though.

    • @demizerone@lemmy.world
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      4•4 months ago

      The worst that can happen is the plane falls out of the sky and some how Trump survives while everyone else dies.

      • @Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        1•4 months ago

        Well, he is no angel, so the chance that he would fly is neglectable.

  • Flying Squid
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    92•5 months ago

    If Musk can fly a rocket, Trump reportedly told associates, per the NYT, he can probably fly an airplane.

    He’s never been on one of his rockets. He’s too chickenshit. Fuck Bezos, but at least he had the balls to go up on a Blue Origin rocket. If you think Musk is ever going to Mars, you’re wrong.

    • @Ledericas@lemm.ee
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      16•4 months ago

      he knows his rockets are shoddy at best, why would he. has he ever driven his own teslas?

  • @xenomor@lemmy.world
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    79•4 months ago

    trump killing himself by using Musk to skirt safety precautions so he can feel special riding around in a shiny new ego tube might be enough to get me wondering if god exists.

  • @Dorkyd68@lemmy.world
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    66•4 months ago

    “Trump dies in fatal Boeing crash, after rushing its production” is a headline id love to see

    • @kent_eh@lemmy.ca
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      15•4 months ago

      “Trump dies in fatal Boeing crash, after rushing its production” is a headline id love to see

      After rushing it’s production and firing all the FAA safety inspectors.

    • @leadore@lemmy.world
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      12•4 months ago

      That can be improved by inserting “and Musk” after the first word.

      • @yourgodlucifer@sh.itjust.works
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        3•4 months ago

        Don’t forget JD Vance!

        • VindictiveJudge
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          5•4 months ago

          As VP, Vance would be on Air Force Two as a precaution.

          • @yourgodlucifer@sh.itjust.works
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            3•4 months ago

            Both planes crash into each other

      • @Jumpingspiderman@lemmy.world
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        2•4 months ago

        please_god_so_fucking_funny.png

        Please, I can only get so hard

    • @zergtoshi@lemmy.world
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      6•4 months ago

      Where can I donate funds to this cause?

    • @ameancow@lemmy.world
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      6•
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      4 months ago

      Maybe if we all concentrate hard enough we can will our reality back on track and make this happen. Somewhere around 2016 someone at CERN started a new experiment and ever since we’ve been in the wrong universe, through concerted efforts of enough of Earth’s latent psychics maybe we can push this world back towards the correct timeline.

      Or maybe make things worse.

      • @leadore@lemmy.world
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        3•4 months ago

        Or maybe make things worse.

        I’m willing to take that chance.

      • @NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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        3•4 months ago

        It does feel like alternative history.

        • @ameancow@lemmy.world
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          1•4 months ago

          In a span of ten years, I lost two parents, a sibling, another sibling was committed and never recovered, nearly lost my partner of 20 years and she ended up in a coma for a month, as a result I lost our shared business, lost my car as a result, then two pets died, then lost my house. Set to all this was Donald Fucking Trump being elected twice, a rampaging virulent epidemic that half the people didn’t believe was real, and nazis coming back and genocides becoming fashionable again, and violent anti-science groups forming across the world.

          It’s reeaaallly hard to not think that there’s something deeply wrong with the world. Particularly after growing up in the 80’s and 90’s when our biggest cultural upset was Ellen coming out on TV guide.

    • @hightrix@lemmy.world
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      3•4 months ago

      There would be a celebration in the streets. Doubly so if Musk was also onboard.

  • @RIPandTERROR@sh.itjust.works
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    60•4 months ago

    • @exploitedamerican@lemm.ee
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      9•4 months ago

      Would be even better if they got boeing to help too. Would be just the best plane ever, such a great plane. Other people would look at it (as it explodes in a fireball in the sky) and say wow what a beautiful thing

    • @SkupaSalataNaPopustu@lemmy.ml
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      6•4 months ago

      We know you can make it happen God, we’ve seen you do it with that skit-of-skits billionaire sub thing God. We know you just need them to all willingly line up God. Well they’re lining up, God! They’re willingly lining up! It’s your time to shine God!

      • MedicsOfAnarchy
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        3•4 months ago

        John 14:13

        And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

  • @PugJesus@lemmy.world
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    49•4 months ago

    Finally, a Trump order I agree with

  • @SarcasticMan@lemmy.world
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    48•5 months ago

    A boy can only dream ;)

  • Lemminary
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    47•4 months ago

    Please let them both ride it together, please please please.

    • MedicsOfAnarchy
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      3•4 months ago

      And take the new FBI director, I hear he likes plane rides.

  • @MiDaBa@lemmy.ml
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    46•4 months ago

    Trump is completely right on this issue. Despite the fact his plane is produced by a company plagued with consistent quality control issues I believe this should be rushed into service as quickly as possible. In fact, I agree that the anyone including temp workers should be allowed in to get this thing in the air today.

    • @NoxAstrum@lemmy.ca
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      4•4 months ago

      I’ll even help.

    • MedicsOfAnarchy
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      1•4 months ago

      All those lights and dials and displays in the cockpit take the pilot’s attention off of flying. Don’t need 'em.

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