Way back before Scott Adams went completely off the deep end I had a tin of Dilbert branded mints called Encourage Mints. This is literally a joke from the hackiest office comic ever yet some manager(s) still thought it was good idea. WTF does business school teach?
They should just attach a turbine to Karl Marx’s coffin … his spinning could probably supply enough power for all of Western Europe.
Company making millions due to its workers efforts, while rewarding them with practically nothing? Sounds like business school is teaching capitalism perfectly.
They aren’t teaching psychology in them. Stupid “gifts” like these are a net negative. You are so much better off giving nothing than a crappy gift.
As far as I can tell, business school teaches people how to enthusiastically participate in the capitalist circlejerk. That’s kinda it.
OP is a goddamn liar and is trying to spread misinformation. Notice how there are TWO staples but only ONE mint??? Nice try OP, but we all see through your poor facade and know you’re actually a two mint-having bitch elitist!
Dammit, don’t tell HR…
Wait 2 mints?!?! Well goddamn if that doesn’t change everything!!!
True, one would be a half hearted thanks but two…
Totally an AI-generated mint.
WTF? I never even got a single mint!
F
DisappointMINT
DiscourageMINT
Lack of commitMINT to fairly compensating your employees
thanks for making us six million here’s a lifesaver
This is the real reason why torches and pitchforks were invented.
What double sucks about this is that every time I’ve seen something like it, it’s some middle manager who fights tooth and nail to try to get their team anything and is given a budget of $6.37 and whatever they can find in the break room for 100 people. I have unfortunately been that guy a few too many times and had to explain to absolutely clueless managers that doing nothing instead is preferable.
Six million more than expected
Great! This helps pay the rent for my apartmint.
And that should be good for your mintal health!
Love that the staple pierces the mint’s wrapper, essentially contaminating it and rendering it potentially unsafe to eat. So you don’t even get that, lol.
Time to find new employMINT.
The corner is missing from the package, but slightly to the left the corner can be found underneath another staple.
I almost thought they re-used the paper for the next guy
Thanks for making our shareholders money! Remember not to call in sick or ask for a raise and that unions take your money with no benefit!
Got our bonusmints
I mean it seems outrageously greedy, but stop and think about it: if they’d paid for a pizza party, the banner would’ve had to read “Thanks for driving sales and beating plan by $5,999,727!!” And that’s just ugly.
I feel this will just breed resentmint
They are not even ashamed of doing this!
I kind of don’t care what company / industry / whatever this was. If you surpassed sales targets by $6 million dollars, you have some cash for decent gifts. Hell a six pack of beer would be something… don’t print me out a goddamn insult. At the same time, knowing how sales compensation usually works, these folks probably got hella paid, weak gifts aside.
No, you don’t understand, that profit is for shareholders and executives. They were the ones that bravely cut lunch breaks and asked the staff to work harder, and they deserve the fruits of the staff’s labour.
All the employees did was produce 100% of the value, but that’s just theor job. Can’t go setting any precedents by rewarding them.
Give me the money, I’ll treat myself instead of giving me something I might not even want.
I assumed this was a nursing sub until I looked closer. Hospital management only does horrid shit like this for staff.
These “rewards” are awful. My condolences.
If you’re lucky though, maybe you’ll get a small rock with a “You Rock!” printout next time.
Actually adding the amount of additional money you made them to the card is the cherry on top.
This is like in the UK when everyone clapped for the NHS workers during the COVID pandemic, including the PM and other government ministers.
But when said workers ask for a pay rise? Fuck off
I broke my back to make a company’s CEO $6,000,000 and all I got was this stupid Polo mint
AND 2 used staples. Don’t you forget that.
I had to go back and look after your comment and it made me realize that the mint is already open and they stapled the torn off piece of the wrapper to it too.
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*comMINT
